How do you see respect in a relationship? Do you think it’s something that is earned, or is it just expected?
It’s interesting because as strange as it may seem, everybody has a different idea of respect in a relationship and I wanted to share some of my thoughts.
R-E-S-P-E-C-T, tell me what it means to me
First things first, what is respect?
Well I think everybody sees it as different things, but the way I look at it is pretty simple.
How does your partner behave when you’re not around?
I think the that’s perhaps one of the easiest ways to tell the respect between your relationship. What do they think of you when they’re not trying to charm you in person?
For me, I think a healthy relationship has trust and respect in it. If the person respects their partner, naturally, they’ll feel more inclined to keep them in mind almost at all times.
It’s a key part of a relationship for me, and it’s something that I genuinely value between two people.
With mutual respect, I think there’s an understanding that is reached, where judgement isn’t considered, and there’s a transparency within the relationship where trust is established.
Respect not only creates trust, but it creates space in a relationship to be yourselves and be comfortable with that.
So how do I keep mutual respect in my relationship?
Well, the first thing is that I make it very clear to my partner.
Since it’s something that is important to me, I want it to be known that mutual respect is a value of mine and I think it’s important for a healthy relationship.
This not only let’s your partner know that respect in a relationship is important to you, but by being clear and transparent, it kicks things off to a good start.
When my relationship first began, I made it very clear to my partner that I had experienced disrespect in my relationships in the past and it really impacted me negatively.
I let her know how important to me it was, and I tried to understand her perspective on this.
The second thing is to give before asking
I think the word mutual should really be emphasized in this section because it’s probably one of the most important things when it comes to respect.
You know how your elementary school teachers and parents always say that respect is earned?
It’s something that I stand by and believe in strongly.
You have to give respect to someone before you receive it.
Whether it’s a friend, a family, or even your significant other.
If you want to be respected, it’s very important to treat your partner with respect.
I always think it’s better to show with actions than with words.
When my partner and I first began our relationship, I showed her every which way I could that I respected her not just as a person, but as my partner.
Through my actions, I think we established a space for transparency and understanding, where she got to know who I am and respect me for staying true to myself.
Lastly, keep them in mind for the little things
Respect for your partner also requires consistency.
To me, it’s something that not only relates to the wellbeing of the relationship, but the wellbeing of your partner as well.
Respect in a relationship could mean so many things, such as how safe they feel in the relationship, or even reflect in their own self esteem.
I’ve found it to be something that I practice every day, and is something that I try to keep in my mind.
Since I love my partner, I want them to feel safe and happy that they are in a relationship with me.
In conclusion
Mutual respect is important in almost any relationship you have with the people in your life.
It determines the health of the relationship and how well it will work out.
To me, it means being yourself. It means being given the feeling of comfort and freedom to express yourself exactly how you want.
It means that you are being valued.
And if there’s anything I’ve learned about relationships, is that sometimes, making the other person feel important, can make all the difference.
How do you view respect in your relationship?
Let me know in the comments!
If you’d like, you can read my previous article on how to love in your twenties.
You can also check out the advice corner where I share some life lessons I’ve learned.
I also write for Medium and a publication called P.S. I Love You.
Thank you so much for reading.
Love always,
Alex
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