The heat of the moment | Saying things you don’t mean

In the heat of the moment, we can all say things we don’t actually mean.

Or maybe, things that shouldn’t be said, get said.

It’s the heat of the moment that we blame it on, that the fire of the conversation just needed more wood or gasoline.

But in the heat of the moment, we don’t think about all these things.

We just say things we don’t mean, and that we wish we can take back.

After an argument

I’m starting in almost a reverse order because when you’re in the heat of the moment, it’s likely you’re not going to remember all of this while you’re in the middle of an argument.

All you can do is think about before and after.

Well starting with after an argument, maybe after the heat of the moment, you can think about what you planned to say at that moment and why you decided not to say it.

I think reflecting is the main theme of this section because it allows us to look at ourselves and how we choose to interact in those situations.

Nine times out of ten, if you held something back, there’s a good chance here’s where you’ll realize why you did.

Almost like if you wrote a letter but didn’t send it, here’s a bit like you reading the letter you didn’t send.

Before the heat of the moment

What about things you can do before it happens to maybe lessen the chance of you saying the wrong thing.

I think regularly keeping honesty in communication is a big one.

It’s hard to have anything that would come up inappropriately if you’re checking in time to time with honesty.

Almost like the idea of an emotional discharge.

Crying even when you’re not sad can discharge the emotional buildup that could be released in the midst of a major situation.

If we let emotions build up, it tends to be severe and may not end in the best way.

As well, I think if there are things that shouldn’t be said, you should remind yourself of that fact. Especially if you know you can have a tendency to say the wrong thing.

Saying something we don’t mean

People can argue that if something wasn’t thought, or wasn’t true, then it wouldn’t have been thought in the first place.

While I can see why it makes sense, I choose to believe in the opposite.

We experience so much every single day, that from time to time, it shouldn’t be a big deal to slip up and make a mistake.

The most importanty thing is remembering that we’re human.

Just because something is said in the heat of the moment, doesn’t mean we mean it.

Have you ever said the wrong thing in the heat of the moment?

Let me know in the comments!

Check out my last article on changing who you are.

You can also check out similar articles in the relationship stuff section.

I also write for Medium and a publication called P.S. I Love You.

Thank you so much for reading.

Love always,

Alex